Welcome Robert Collins, Author of Short Story Collection

talking doorknobs

talking doorknobs

Title: Fun Tales pf Fantasy and the Future
Author’s Name: Robert Collins
Genre: Science fiction, fantasy
Links to Purchase Short Story Collection:
Sample Short Story:
The doorknob greeted his hand.  “I’m glad you’re choosing me to go through this entryway,” it chirped, “instead of that snobby keypad.”  He heaved a sigh.  It was going to be a very long day. 
He stepped out of his room and into the hall.  A light came on and he screamed. “I’m sorry,” the light control said, “but you activated the motion sensor.  I’ll try to modulate the brightness.”  Of course, nothing happened. 
He walked into the bathroom.  He reached for the cupboard, and it opened.  He looked at the deodorant, and an arm handed it to him.  “I do have arms, you know,” he said stiffly.  He went to the under-cabinet and took out a towel. 
“You just washed that towel,” a voice reminded him. 
“So what?”
“There are other towels that you have not used in two hundred-twenty hours and nine minutes.”
“I’ll think about it.”  He went back to his bedroom, had the day’s clothes handed to him, and returned to
the bathroom.  At first he set the clothes on the counter, but a gentle reminder from a machine voice inspired him to fold them first.  He sat down on the toilet. After relieving himself, a jolt of water came up his tailpipe.  He was muttering dark and obscene oaths when he stepped into the shower.
Hot water abruptly gushed at him.  He screamed again.  “Turn the head down!”
“Anyway, I didn’t ask for water!”
“You were saying something. I merely assumed you were whispering.  After all, you rarely yell this early in the morning.”
“Just shut up and hand me the soap.” He started to violently dread breakfast and the commute to work.
The moral?  When the doorknobs start making eloquent apologies, it might be a good time to get back to nature.
— end —

About Katrina Parker Williams

Katrina Parker Williams teaches English composition and grammar at a community college. She is a Barton College graduate with a B.S. in Communications and a Masters of Education in English from East Carolina University. She is also the author of a fictional novel titled Liquor House Music. Her works have appeared in Charlotte Viewpoint, Muscadine Lines, Usadeepsouth, and on the Wilson Community College website. Her writings have recently been published at The Saints’ Placenta and All Things Girl and is forthcoming in Dead Mule School of Southern Literature and Muscadine Lines.
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